Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Randomize
