my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
