she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Randomize
