oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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