what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize