He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
