Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
