I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
