I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
