There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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