Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Randomize
