This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I just forgot I was standing up.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
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