That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Randomize
