Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
