One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
The ass gains better be worth it
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