So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I should be sponsored by Trojan
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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