It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Watching her eat just hurts me
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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