these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
