Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
