Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
