I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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