I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I lost the right to judge tonight
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
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