She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
