Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
