Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Randomize
