His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I want her autograph on my taint
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
