i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
