As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
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