What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Randomize
