i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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