yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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