Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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