I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Even my vagina gasped.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
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