Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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