bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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