Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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