The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
