in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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