i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
The air was thick with penises
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
