sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
