oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
