Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize