That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Houston, we have a squirter
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Randomize
