Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
