i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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