if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize