I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Randomize
