Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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