when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
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