my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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