Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(773): View more from Illinois

i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.

(773): View more from Illinois

SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person

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(305): View more from Florida

I just saw a hot homeless man

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(443): View more from Maryland

So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem

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(514): View more from Quebec

He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.

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(561): View more from Florida

This is the prime rib incident all over again

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old

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(845): View more from New York

I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin

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(602): View more from Arizona

he bit THROUGH my nipple

(480): View more from Arizona

plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.

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(240): View more from Maryland

I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.

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